Being a stay at home mom is a huge change in my life. I used to work in Marketing before having my litter of babies. I would go to bed early during the week to make sure I could get up in time for work. Get dressed up and stay out late on weekends. I would chill with friends whenever my little heart desired and shop like it was my job.
Nowadays I stay up late during the week feeding babies. Change out of my spit-up-on clothes into a different pair of yoga pants and shirt before crashing. Not sure if they are clean, but at least they are not wet with vomit. Throw my hair up in a bun. Yes so the babies can't pull it, but mainly because I haven't showered in days, because who has time for that.
The trips are 7 months old and came home right before flu season hit. I am all for going out, but not during this time of year. The weather is awfully bitter and the illness is insanely high. My husband, Aerol, will go to work during the day and I will take our babies to their doctor appointments. We will then come home and not leave the house again until their next doctor appointment. This could be days or weeks later. We are hoping by staying quarantined, they will not get sick this winter. Three babies is challenging enough, we don't need to add sickness or another hospital stay to the list!
All that aside, Aerol and I went out for the first time in months just a week or so ago. We attended his winter work party. Oh boy!
To "go out"... What does that even mean? Time has flown by since babies and not much went on while I was pregnant either. Being pregnant is exhausting. Do I have to actually put my face on, run a brush through my hair and change out of my baby stained clothes? Wait...does this mean I have to shower. I was at a loss as to what needed to happen to be able to "go out". I pulled my phone out, tapped on the Google app and looked up "go out". I was feeling pretty confident before I tapped "search", but soon after I did, I was more lost than ever. I'm sure you are dying to know what it said, that is if you haven't already looked it up yourself. Patience grasshopper...
Definition one: To be extinguished
As much as I would like to have the time of my life when I get out of the house, I don't really want to blow up in flames.
Definition two: ebb; recede to low tide
To ebb and flow is very repetitious. This is what my day to day life is like already. Quite frankly, it is not what I had imagined when hitting the town for a few hours.
Still rusty on what to "go out" actually meant, I figured going to take a shower would be a great first step. Lucky for me, our water heater needed some parts replaced, so we didn't have hot water (cold shower here I come). After freezing myself to death, I decided to Google "night out meaning". I wanted to make sure this was worth the torture I just put myself through. That definition made me realize what needed to happen. "Spending the evening away from one's usual residence". I figured that would be easy to do, so I finished getting ready to have an evening away from the babies.
Our friend then came over to get the low down on caring for the babies. I was rambling on about our routine so she would know what to do while we were gone. About how Arya has the purple blanket, Trae loves his lovey (an animal blanket with a pacifier attached) and Natashia prefers to play on the mat closest to the wall. That is when it hit me. I was being one of those "crazy moms". Just going on and on about everything. Things that didn't even matter. I remember having to suffer through this when I would watch other people's kids. I told myself when I wear the parent shoes, I would never inflict this daunting pain on anyone. My friend, surprisingly, was a champ and hung in there until I felt comfortable enough to leave. It helped there wasn't much time for me to reconsider before we had to go.
While we were out, I had a great time. I was able to talk to people I hadn't seen in a while and feel like a human again. My friend knew me too well so I received many pictures and updates throughout the night. Every picture I got, I just kept thinking how they have gotten so big! Aerol (my husband) thought I was being ridiculous. "We have been gone for an hour. There is no way they have grown since we left" he told me. But I still had that urge to want to text her every couple of minutes to check-in. That desire to want to be right next to them. The urge to go home and snuggle up with my babies by my side.
Overall I did well. I did not text her asking for updates and ended up staying out for about 5 hours. Everyone was impressed with me. They didn't think I was going to last that long. They even placed bets on how long I was going to be able to stay away. Mind you, they both lost. To be completely honest, I was proud of myself. Getting out of the house was the right decision. Especially since I hadn't really been anywhere for 7 months. At the end of the day though, being able to stay home with my triplets is a blessing and I wouldn't change it for the world.
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